Good or Evil Decision Self-Test

I think that this might be effective in future decision making, and the self-doubt and guilt and self-reassurances post-choice that the decision made was the best of the options available at the time, or something like that. To help know if you're being good or bad; if what you're pondering on doing is ok with the universe or the karma gods or what have you, or just within your true self if it honestly sits well with you, deep in the truth of you at your core, way down. Ha. Ok.

So the test is simple: Ask yourself if "God" would give you permission, or if he wouldn't give you permission, if you asked him for permission to do what you're thinking about doing. Yes, you do get a chance to explain to God the complications of your situation, and God is open-minded and receptive and understands all the perspectives and is like the fairest judge - dad ever. So if God knows where you're coming from, and he's your dad, and you're like hey dad is it ok if I do this thing? Here's what's going on. Because, in this world of shadiness and gray area everywhere - (are black and white even actual colors?) - serious idealism, like what I delusionally fancied as some kind of religion or something, is not fair and it's not realistic by any means. When is every part of everything the way it's thought to ideally be? It's not. Even if you have a good shopping experience at a shopping place, I'm 110% (I can't stand it when people say that, and it makes me really enjoy using it I'm sorry) sure that something fucked up happened in the chain of however what made your shopping experience perfect, something behind the scenes, if not everything that business is structured by, is totally fucked up. Something is fucked up with everything. I'm talking out my ass now and this is not where I meant to go with this.

Anyways. I think the God-dad test is a good idea, for me at least. And that's where I end this part, which means it's the beginning of something else, which makes me feel kind of sad, because I have attachment issues and it's more of a nostalgia thing and knowing nothing will ever be the same again, never the same as when I typed this in the dark in Max's apartment with a weird cup that turns blue with cold in front and to the left of me, by the main part of the laptop and above the full-size USB keyboard I have USB connected and situated between myself and the actual laptop, with a duck on the other side of the cup from me, a yellow puppet duck with a tuft of white hair on its head that Haven just adores, man, he's CRAZY about that puppet duck. And there's a bulldozer toy with a windshield sticker of a WOMAN driving the bulldozer with a huge :D - style grin, next to that a half-ingested blue ring pop with a yellow base. There's stuff everywhere, and it's all awesome, and it will never be this time this way again. Never. I love you.